I can understand wanting to lose weight so I'll stop making jokes at your expense directly to your face, but openly complaining about it in public isn't helping you. Yes we can all see the rolls on your stomach that you're pointing out and yes you have cankles, but the only person that you can blame for that is yourself. Unless you have a condition that causes you to put on weight, you are the orchestrator of your horrible body.
Judging by your inability to see your toes I'm assuming you don't know the first thing about weight loss. Here's a little advice, the fastest and most efficient way to lose weight is to stop stuffing your face with food, you cow. I don't spend most of my time eating vegetables and chicken because I like them so much, I do it because I don't want to look like you. Add in a little gym time and I'm sure you'll notice a difference almost immediately. Obviously you're not going to get down to the weight you want overnight, these things take time, but at least you would be doing something about it.
If I hear you complaining about losing weight again I'm simply going to cut off one of your limbs. You wanted to lose weight, I plan on giving you the ultimate in weight loss. Not only would you lose what looks to be about 50 pounds, but it could probably feed a family of four for a week. I would be helping everybody out at once, like Jesus.
The guy tossing healthy diets into your purse
Posted by Atkins under Letters to the Public
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